Wednesday, June 29, 2011


There's a new phenomenon sweeping the nation: popcorn brain. It sounds like something zombies would be all about (can I have extra butter on those BRAINS?!). However, it seems it's actually something that will turn all of us into zombies: social network zombies.

I wonder what will happen once people realize they're afflicted with this devastating condition. Most likely Google's servers will crash with the influx of "online support groups for popcorn brain" searches, and the Facebook group  "Help, I'm addicted to Facebook" will be the fastest to reach one million "likes."

Now if you'll excuse me, my two month old just sent me a text alerting me to the fact that she wants some nibbles, and my two year old tweeted something about Yo Gabba Gabba.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

A little pick-me-"Up"

While I can't say I'd like to be as surly as Carl Fredrickson, I certainly wish to obtain his outstanding ability to overcome the inconvenient affects of aging.  Good old Mr. Fredrickson starts off with a crick in his back and a stair-chair, and finishes of his grand adventure able to navigate the Venezuelan jungle dragging a bungalow held up by balloons. Did you see those evasive maneuvers he used to escape the wrath of Charles Muntz atop the "Spirit of Adventure"?! Awe inspiring.

When he lost his bitterness, he must have gained miraculous regenerative abilities. I hope you're listening, crabby old people!

Thursday, June 23, 2011

There's only one prescription for that fever

I was watching the Today Show this morning and found that preteen girls can be unbelievably rude. There was Justin Beiber, trying to discuss his new ladies' perfume and the charities to which he's donating the proceeds, and these tweens just kept screaming and flailing like some rare species of possessed bird. I couldn't even hear what the fellow was saying! Poor Beiber, it looks like we still can't take you seriously.

Although if you'd like to be taken seriously, you probably shouldn't sell ladies' perfume....

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Now that's ambitious

When you were a kid, you had a dream job, right? All kids want to grow up to be something amazing. A vet, a doctor, a rocket scientist. My ambition was a little nontraditional, and I have to say I'm moderately jealous of my brother: he gets to wear a costume to work. I don't mean a uniform, I mean a straight-up costume. I wanted to be Chuck E. Cheese, or a professional sports team's mascot; anything where I could where a costume and a big fake head.

I was an odd child.

I admit, my brother hasn't exactly stolen my childhood dream. He wears period clothing at his job at the Henry Ford. No large foam heads involved. However, it is far closer than I've gotten. I think they might frown upon a nurse showing up at work with a giant tiger head attached (although some days I feel like that might be beneficial).

I just hope no one in my family beats me to my new ambition: shooting a hand gun, and driving a motorcycle. Preferably simultaneously.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011


Best thing ever: “5 easy steps”

How awesome is it when you're trying to do something super complicated, and in your searches through the Internet you find a “5 easy steps” version? Today I learned how to update my wardrobe with 5 simple pieces, make fancy floral arrangements with just 10 dollars, and how to make 3 meals with only 5 ingredients (that's right, I was watching daytime programming with my kids).

I'm a firm believer that all things in life should have the easy instructions readily accessible. Imagine the possibilities!

5 easy steps to:
-redoing your kitchen
-training your husband to clean the bathroom without being asked
-getting your toddler to take a nap
-winning the Super Bowl

I don't know about you, but those first three would make my life a lot better! The last one too, if the Lions subscribed to those hacks.

On a different note, I'm also a firm believer that there should be a mariachi version of all songs. 5 easy steps, anyone?

Monday, June 20, 2011


Recently my husband gave me an unexpected compliment:

“I like reading your writing. You should write more”

Now I can only image to which writing he was referencing. My most recent writing endeavors were composed in APA format and submitted for a grade (incidentally, if you find I start blogging with one inch margins and include a reference page, you'll understand why).

Perhaps he was referring to the love notes I so politely leave for him:

You're awesome. Please bring the kitty litter in the house since I'm too lazy to carry that 50lb box into the basement. Thanks
<3 Lolo”

If that's the case, he must have been talking about my hand-writing, not my eloquent prose. Although who doesn't appreciate a good note about kitty litter every once in a while?

Whatever the reason was, he told me to blog. I told him there are not many things I have to talk about, but maybe I could think of a few: things I'm excited about (dark chocolate!), things I'm passionate about (NFL lockout?!?), things I'm afraid of (sinkholes), or maybe things that are just plain silly (did you know aliens gave Moses the ten commandments?). So, we'll see what kind of ridiculous comments I have to make about life in general. I feel we'll find my writings to be blissfully boring and extraordinarily mediocre.