Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Can you tell me how to get.....

Every day on Sesame Street they have a "word of the day." It's usually something pretty applicable to daily life. Today it was "appetite." Well I have an appetite for good words.

My word of the day: Facetious.

Why today?

Why not today? It's my favorite word!

Why is it my favorite word?

Think about what a good word it is! It's fun to say, a little tricky to spell, and so much fun to be. While I have little to no tolerance for sarcasm (mainly because I lack the social perceptiveness to discern between sarcasm and just plain mean), facetiousness can be more lighthearted and full of whimsy.

So, Sesame Street, teach my children some fun words to really advance their vocabularies. My precocious children, who snack on spinach and Asiago salads, demand more obscure words from talking puppets.

And I'm not just being facetious.

Monday, July 11, 2011

Green acres and acres of garbage

I was recently attempting to make strides in my effort to be a good steward of God's creation. I try to sort the recycling from the legitimate trash, and walk to the farm market with my reusable grocery bags in tow. I even considered cloth diapering for like, a day (the idea of poop-filled plastic festering in a landfill for 500 years made me feel like a bit of a fiend for contributing to the crap-pile).

But.... I don't want to spend hundreds of dollars on cloth diapers, and have to rinse poo off of my children all day. Additionally, I'd rather my house smell like the sanitizing, cancer causing, earth-killing chemicals in my kitchen cleaner than use the main ingredient in my favorite salad dressing to clean the house.

Besides, is using biodegradable nappies really going to make a dent in the imminent destruction being imposed upon our planet when I receive piles of junk mail in amounts comparable to Dumbledore trying to tell Harry Potter he's a wizard? (sorry, spoiler alert)

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Wired help

When are we going to get robots to do all the work for us? If historic entertainment is any indication, we only have 4 years to develop flying cars as a realistic means of travel, and about 50 years to have robots doing our housework while we live in outer space. I suppose if the apocalypse is coming next year anyway, it's of no consequence whether I have my robot and flying car just yet. However, it'd certainly be beneficial if I had a Rosie to take care of the kids and provide maintenance to my automatic laundry-folding machine so I could go shopping all day. If only I had a time-traveling DeLorean. I could zip to the future to snag some advanced technology and use it to my benefit before next December.

I blame Obama: cancelling the space program and all.